Monday, May 28, 2012

How to Learn from your Mistakes

PULKIT ARORA


Nobody likes to make mistakes. But as the age-old saying goes: “to err is human”.


Unless, you want to live as a recluse all throughout your life, you are bound to make mistakes almost every other day. Some can be small trifling errors and some can be unpardonable blunders. But they'll come to you for sure. While you can't do away with them completely, you can surely minimise them and learn from them. If you learn from mistakes correctly, they can propel you forward in the right direction.

Mistakes are an essential part of self-improvement. Don't be overwhelmed with guilt and remorse, rather you should analyze how you can learn from them and be a better human being.

Here's how you should do that:
Apologising Like a Gentleman
If your mistake has been a source of grief or harm to the people (directly or indirectly), it's important to offer a dignified apology. You must clarify that it was an unfortunate incident and you will take care that it is not repeated. If you refrain from apologizing, out of embarrassment or reluctance, the offended person will continue to hold it against you. This may also make a dent in your trustworthiness and your overall image.

If your apology is sincere, the other person is likely to forgive you. Don't go overboard with it. Apologise once, but sincerely. A good apology can help in restoring other people's trust in you.
Don't be a Perfectionist
Come to terms to this reality that it is impossible for us ordinary mortals to be perfectionists. If you spend your life being scared of making mistakes, you'll hardly be able to do anything in life. Mistakes are often not made, they just happen to people. If you think that you have to steer away from mistakes all throughout your life, you'll be imposing psychological restrictions on yourself.

Don't Waste Time Trying to Justify your Actions


It is our natural disposition to keep justifying our actions. Many times, we blame others for the mistake. Sometimes we say that it was not in my capacity to prevent so-and-so thing from happening. We say things like, “Yes I couldn't score well in the test but then the teacher didn't really teach anything in the class” and easily forget about the numerous classes skipped during the last session.

More often than not, we justify mistakes to massage our fragile egos. Others aren't really interested in our justifications. There's no harm in accepting your faults and apologizing and then moving on.
Understanding Why Mistakes Happen and Then Not Repeating Them
One can err to several reasons. To avoid repeating them, you have to understand and analyze the core causes. For example, you may have spoken rudely to someone in anger and haste. You must think what caused you to get enraged. Why should an innocent person becoming a victim of your anger? Ask questions. You may also be regularly making mistakes due to fatigue, sleeplessness, bad habits, and other health-related (physical and mental) issues. It this is the case, then rush to a doctor ASAP.


Now this self-analysis should not drown you in an ocean of guilt. Rather, it should reinforce your resolution to learn from mistakes. Careful consideration and sustained effort can help you free yourself of many errors, if not all.

Mistakes Give Opportunities to Learn, Grab Them

Just like failures, you can “seize mistakes” and learn from them. Don't let these opportunities go wasted. You can gain wisdom from your mistakes and fast-track the process of self-improvement. The important thing is to view mistakes as gateways to improvements in life.

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